Your Response to Anxiety is Nervous Control
You manage anxiety by trying to control it — but its causes nervous tension.
You’ve been trying hard, maybe harder than anyone realises.
You’ve read the books, followed the steps, downloaded the apps, tried the supplements, the breathing, the tapping, the journaling, the cold plunges, the affirmations…You’re trying to do everything right…
Because something in you knows this anxiety doesn’t belong here, and if you could just get on top of it, you’d be free again.
And it’s exhausting! Mentally and emotionally…and it doesn't seem to be working, does it?
Here’s the trap:
All that effort to get anxiety under control is creating more tension… and more anxiety.
Nervous Control is a response that starts from a good place: You want your life back. You want to feel grounded, calm, and capable again.
But when the need to fix or manage anxiety becomes constant… it wires your nervous system into a state of hypervigilance and nervous tension. You’re always “doing something” about anxiety, and your poor body never gets a chance to feel calm without effort.
It’s not your fault. You’ve been taught to “manage” anxiety with tools.
But managing it is not the same as healing it.
What This Might Look Like:
Trying multiple anxiety techniques at once, hoping one sticks
Continually researching more coping strategies or techniques to try
Starting every morning with a strict self-regulation routine
A New Way Forward
The goal isn’t to give up on support tools, it’s to change your relationship with anxiety itself.
Because when you’re constantly trying to fix it, you’re telling your system: “This is a problem.”
To shift out of Nervous Control, you’ll begin with the second step of the E.A.S.E. Method: ACCEPT
Here are two gentle ways to begin:
1. Choose One Supportive Action — and Let That Be Enough
Instead of throwing everything at anxiety, pick just one thing that will allow you to just be with the feeling and let it pass.
Take a moment. Breathe. Then do… nothing else.
This teaches your nervous system that it doesn’t need to scramble to be okay and that you’re still safe, even with anxiety!
2. Gently Catch the Urge to “Fix”
When you notice that urgent feeling, “I need to do something to make this stop”, pause and ask:
“Is this helping me feel safe… or is it keeping me on edge?”
The goal isn’t to stop the urge. Just noticing it allows you to acknowledge it and that is enough to let it go.
This is just the beginning.
When you stop treating anxiety like an emergency, it stops acting like one.
Inside the EASE Method, I’ll show you how to rewire the way you relate to anxiety so it no longer runs the show. You’ll learn how to stop over-efforting, over-managing, and over-monitoring... and start actually feeling free.
Created by Clinical Psychologist
ABOUT DIANTE FUCHS, CLIN. PSYCHOLOGIST
Diante Fuchs is a Clinical Psychologist, international anxiety coach, and author of The Gift of Anxiety. She’s been helping people heal from anxiety and panic since 2010 — not by managing symptoms, but by changing the way they understand and respond to anxiety altogether.
Through her signature EASE Method (and a refreshingly honest approach to mental health), Diante helps high-achieving, insightful people reclaim their confidence and feel like themselves again — without medication or endless coping strategies.
Her work is grounded in neuroscience, clinical expertise, and over a decade of experience, but what sets her apart is her belief that anxiety isn’t a disorder — it’s a message. And when we learn how to listen to it, everything changes.